The Side Effects of
Witnessing Murder by Cheryl Ford RN
The Side Effects of
Witnessing Murder
by Cheryl Ford RN
April 21, 2005
Three weeks have passed since Terri Schindler-Schiavo was forced to die
an inhumane and tragic death. Thousands who were against Terri's killing
claim they find themselves awake at all hours of the night trying to
come to terms with what happened to Terri. Many state they are suffering
from overwhelming depression, frustration, and feelings of
powerlessness. Others find themselves struggling to understand how
America stood by and allowed Terri to be publicly murdered and not
receive judicial or police protection.
Only a few short weeks ago, we witnessed thousands upon thousands of
people from all over the world rise in protest to the heinous crime
involving the murder of Terri Schindler-Schiavo. During the long 14 day
period, as Terri laid suffering from starvation and dehydration, members
of the US Congress gathered in a weekend forum to vote on a bipartisan
bill that would assure Terri's constitutional rights. The bill was aimed
at saving her life. The President of the United States who was preparing
for Easter with his family, was urgently flown from his vacation ranch
home in Texas to the White House to sign a bill that was passed in a 203
to 58 vote. So, why now are we faced with feeling the unsettling side
effects of Terri's murder? Why do many seek answers to questions such
as: How does a nation justify, publicly watching the death of an
innocent disabled woman while no one was capable of stopping her murder?
When trying to find any sense of understanding or acceptance regarding
Terri's murder, we must discuss some aspects surrounding the topics of
death. Death, as we all know, is defined as: "A permanent cessation of
all vital functions." Due to its permanency, we find death very
disturbing under any circumstance. Death creates a destabilization of
our existence, knowing there is no turning back. Normally, we experience
death when it results from illness, unexpected trauma, or old-age. We
are seldom, if ever, confronted with the unique emotions associated
with murder happening in our family. When we hear about a murder we
usually find ourselves gasping at the crime as it makes headline news.
The loss of human life is final and emotionally traumatizing on any
society. Any way we wish to view it, the intentional infliction of death
on a human being, will always be defined as murder. Our country bases
its philosophy on the value of "preservation of all life," thus,
creating its laws to say, under no circumstances should anyone take the
life of an innocent human being. We ask then, why was Terri allowed to
be murdered as the world stood by and watched?
Once we are subjected to loss of life, we naturally emerge into what is
known as the grieving process. Grief as we know it, has limitless
boundaries. Often when we are forced to grieve, we flail aimlessly and
timelessly into what appears to be an open abyss. Dr. Elisabeth Kubler
Ross describes in her book "Death and Dying," the 5 stages of grief as:
Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression and Acceptance. In order to move
through the grieving process, we must at some point encounter the 5
stages of grief. Many will vacillate between the phases of grief for an
undetermined period of time.
We also know there are thousands of people who routinely struggle with
the controversial issues surrounding the death penalty. It is not
unusual, or unreasonable for people to find difficulty digesting the
legal liberties that are given to man when they are authorized to
inflict the finalities of death upon any human being. Be the death
penalty right or wrong, even those who struggle with it can often find
some sense of rationale and acceptance in knowing that those on death
row were convicted and tried for a crime which brought forth their death
sentence. However, what happens to the thousands who are reaching for
that same sense of understanding and acceptance when grieving for
Terri's publicly inhumane murder? Terri, was not a criminal and never
hurt anyone. She was not tried or convicted of any crime. She was not
terminally ill, or unhealthy. She was not taken off to the hidden
ominous fields where victims are murdered by their unknown killers.
Despite all, we had a nation that was forced to watched Terri's tragic
and unnecessary death, making it difficult, if not impossible, to
transition into the acceptance phase of grief.
We recognize that Terri was not any more special to her parents, than
any other child is to their parents who love them. It is a given that
she will be just as missed by her family, as others tend to miss their
family members when they die. However, as we seek some
rationalization, and acceptance in dealing with Terri's death, like we
do in the normal grieving process of others, we find ourselves with an
unsettling set of uncomfortable emotions. Could it be due to the
disturbing visions of a Mother publicly pleading for the life of her
daughter; a daughter who would not be dead if
it weren't for an estranged spouse who intentionally starved and
dehydrated her to death?
These visions leave the sane population very distraught. We
find ourselves asking, how do we move into the acceptance phase of grief
after watching a disabled member of our society be murdered and denied
the right to receive help? We will remember Terri as the innocent woman
who through her means of natural communications waited patiently each
day for her loving and very dedicated family to visit her so she could
smile and laugh with them. We will recall how her biological family had
struggled for years to be capable of providing her with the therapy that
we all naturally reach for when we are hurting, or injured. We shall
remember the look of love and warmth on the faces of Terri and her
Mother as they embraced each other. Was the love and unity of the
Schindler family so wrong a bond that we had to remove one of its
members?
For Terri, sadly, the help that we normally would have expected to come
her way, never arrived. Where does this leave the thousands of civilized
people who are in shock, remembering the agonizing expressions on Mary's
face as she pleaded for someone, anyone, to help rescue her daughter?
How do we as a nation cope with Terri's unnecessary and brutal murder; a
murder that we not only heard about over and over again though out every
media source, but were also forced to watch as it appeared on national
television for 14 long days? How do we justify the murder of a woman who
was healthy and did not have to die, yet, we did nothing to stop it?
When did America begin denying a family the right to care for one of its
members? Who will be next?
I personally refuse to accept the notion that we have become a barbaric
society living amongst many others like George Felos, Michael Schiavo,
George Greer, and Deborah Bushnell. The four people who comfortably
watched Terri slowly have the life sucked out of her, and then later
rationalized Terri's death as merciful. Terri's death cannot be defined
as anything but cold, callous, inhumane, unnecessary, unmerciful,
wrong, and against all the laws that our country was founded upon. Laws
that still read, MURDER is illegal! Assuming the majority of our world
still believes murder is wrong, we must ask ourselves what can we do to
prevent Terri's situation from happening to another individual? How can
we seek justice for Terri and see to it that the four people who are
responsible for the 14 days of her inhumane killing are brought to legal
justice?
We must also ask ourselves, is it reasonable to suggest that the
thousands who supported Terri, who were appalled and against her death,
the emotionally unstable religious zealots that George Felos suggested
they were? Or, is it more reasonable to say that it was Terri's
estranged spouse, his euthanasia attorneys, and the judge in Pinellas
County, who are the emotionally unstable death zealots who need to be
convicted for their criminal actions?
Most importantly, as a civilized society, we must question, are we
prepared to challenge the inhumane laws that killed Terri? Or, are we
willing to allow her death to be in vain and chalk it up to becoming the
new season preview for Reality Guardianship Murders? I do believe that
it is vitally important for every person who grieves Terri's tragic
death to have all of these questions answered in an effort to enter into
the Acceptance phase of grief.
© by C Ford 2005- All Rights Reserved